First thought...

Confabulations by Me is my newest blog that will be a place to discuss and share my thoughts about the adoption world, all angles, all points of view. I am currently on the waiting list to adopt a newborn in the US, yet I have many fears for how the current adoption world is working. Mainly my fear is that the agency will treat an expectant mother as a "baby machine". That scares and worries me, and most of all saddens and devastates me.

Why dont I simply choose a different method of adoption?

Because I believe there are cases, fewer then norm, but they exist, where I will be needed. I believe that somebody that chooses me someday will truely have no other choice that will be best for her infant child...... I want to be there for her, and for her child.. I would like to be a mother, but I would not like to "screw" smeone else to get there... And so my wait continues......

Right now I strugle with the idea of "what is best" for a child... There are so many opinons on this.

I believe a two parent home (while important and signifigant) is not a reason to place a child for adoption.. If anything this should be considered as a "bonus" but even adoptive parents divorce, so this should not be a signifigant reason.

I believe age is nothing... Ok personally its something, but I know mothers who kept thier children at age 14, and they did great, so Im not going to think my opinion is "law".. I am sure that SOME girls at the age of 14 would be terrible mothers (but so are some girls at age 35).

Drugs and Alcohol is a concern for me...... Do I condem a mother by taking her child because of it? Maybe? In some cases, most definatly... But I dont think all cases....

Finances? This depends, and its terribly sad..... I think a person can make ends meat with a part time job, and assistance from the state... But at the same time, if somoene is already struggling imensely, its hard to imagine how they will survive with an additional mouth to feed. How sad that this is such a problem in the US :( (I guess what Im saying is, if its finances as a main reason, then it should be VERY poor, like struggling to even keep yourself above water, you know what I mean?)

I can say all this...... YET, I honestly dont think I ever have a right to judge why a person should or should not choose adoption vs parenting...